Countdown to Who Cares?

And today, we conclude our look at DC's latest Countdown teaser, because, well, I don't have any more ideas. Actually, I don't have an idea for this post, but I didn't have any ideas for the previous ones ahead of time either, so . . .

I dunno . . . Mary Marvel is . . . evil? And does . . . evil . . . stuff? Lex Luthor looks pretty upset, huh? And that Pied Piper guy is all gesturing towards him--what's up with that? And don't get me started on Catwoman! I am convinced the key to this picture is Catwoman, because . . . seriously, what the fuck is the point of this picture? Yeah, it's a nice looking piece of art and Ethan Van Sciver does a great job, but, really, what the fuck? Are there actually people trying to figure this shit out? Do people care? Is this getting people all excited, especially after reading Didio's explanation of the first one? I mean, say what you will about Marvel: Elektra getting run through and turning out to be a Skrull is a LOT more exciting than weirdo cryptic image with an infinite number of possibilities. You know what would make this image a worthwhile tool? CONTEXT. Without any context, the whole thing is meaningless. Readers of Countdown can probably figure out a few of these things, but some are totally meaningless. What is up with Catwoman? Or the Martian Manhunter? Or Mullet Superman? Have any of them been mentioned in the same sentence as the whole Countdown thing before this? If not, then so what? The sad thing is, my four crazy theories seem just as likely as any others, because there's nothing here to provide any real guidance. I'm all for trying to get the fans involved and excited, but to do so in a game of "Guess how I took a plot-point, altered it symbolically to get here, except do it in reverse!"? Why not just tell compelling, interesting stories that get people excited? Honestly, I'm not a DC guy or a Marvel guy--look through my collection, you'll find I'm split pretty evenly and that's usually because of the creator, not the character, but Marvel has me interested right now and DC doesn't and that says something, because my only loyalty is to the writing. And this image did nothing for me except inspire contempt and the urge to make fun of it for a week.

But, hey, at least someone's talking about it, I guess. That's something.