Tuesday, June 26, 2007

8 Things

I got tagged by Spencer Carnage and figure I better participate or else . . . well, I dunno. Something, I'm sure.

First things first:

- I have to post these rules before I start.
- I have to tell you eight facts about myself.
- I have to tag eight people to participate.
- I'm supposed to leave a comment telling them they're tagged and to read my blog.
- And the tagees need to write their own blog post, telling us eight things and posting the rules.

Since I was tagged for this blog and not my personal one, I'll try to keep the facts all comic-related.

1. I like Spider-Clones.

No, that's a lie. I LOVE Spider-Clones. Fuck all of you who say cloning Spider-Man is wrong and against God's plan. God wants as many Spider-Men as possible so each can have his own monthly book, thus making sure you don't NEED to buy any of them except for the one of your choice. The Spectacular Spider-Man is a different Spider-Man from the Amazing Spider-Man! Web of Spider-Man? WHICH FUCKING SPIDER-MAN????

That, and the whole clone saga was awesome for the first six months to a year, okay? The lesson with that story isn't that clones are bad, it's that you need to know how to tell a story right. Two different things.

2. I like Warren Ellis' writing about comics more than his comics.

In one pile, you have Transmetropolitan, Planetary, The Authority and every other comic Ellis has ever done. In the other, Come in Alone, the two volumes of From the Desk of . . ., the two volumes of Bad Signal plus a special book collecting everything else he's written about comics.

I choose pile number two. Hell, if the second pile was just Come in Alone, I'd still choose the second pile. Ellis' comics are great, but his writing on comics is better.

As for why, it may just be that Ellis writes in a very intelligent manner about comics from the perspective of a creator who operates well within the mainstream while maintaining a sense of individualism. Not many people do that and the others who do it just don't do it as well. Same can't be said for his comics (although, I realised the other day that he writes a shitload of comics and the worst of the bunch are still better than most of what's on the shelves).

3. I don't like DC: New Frontier.

I've said it before, but I got the first volume of this "masterpiece" and found it lacking. Lacking quality, that is. (OH!) Seriously, the story didn't engage me, the characters had little or no development and I couldn't think of a single reason WHY I was reading it. Nothing in it seemed to warrant my attention aside from the art, which was pretty.

4. I'm getting on the Joe Casey bandwagon before it leaves the station.

The way people discuss Grant Morrison right now? That will be Joe Casey someday, so that's why you see me writing about his stuff a lot. Trust me. Automatic Kafka and Codeflesh will be beloved by all.

5. I'm looking forward to the new Thor book.

What can I say, I love that Norse god. Although, not a month goes by that I don't curse Marvel for using Warren Ellis' direction for the character beyond the eight or ten issues William Messner-Loebs did (which were good). Shirtless, human-talking Thor who fucked the Enchantress and fought mad scientist cannibals, while avoiding chain-smoking British cops. What's not to like?

6. I don't read Ultimate Spider-Man simply because he doesn't say "fuck."

Fuck you, I was a geeky guy in high school and I said "fuck." And I was last in high school five years ago--teens have gotten even more foul-mouthed since then. At least have Ultimate Wolverine call Sabretooth a "cocksucker." Because he would. Because Sabretooth is a cocksucker.

7. I still feel cheated by the whole "Reign of the Supermen" storyline.

DC said one of them would be Superman! None of them became Superman! My ten-year-old self is fucking pissed off, DC. You pussed out and now I don't trust comic companies at all. Oh, oh, oh, Captain America's dead? MAYBE HE'S SHOW UP IN SOME FUCKING ROBOT AND JUMP OUT COVERED IN WEIRD LIQUIDS! SUPERMAN DID! Elektra's a Skrull? Yeah, maybe she isn't and that's just what the Kree want us to think! I read your book, you magnificant bastard!

8. I never understood why Superboy freaked out when he found out Lex Luthor's DNA was also used to clone him.

Seriously, what the fuck? Shouldn't he have spent, like, five minutes going "Well, that sucks" and then MOVED THE FUCK ON BECAUSE WHO FUCKING CARES? You're a clone, for fuck's sake! You were already some weird freak, so adding a slightly more freakish thing into your story doesn't mean shit. Maybe if you found out that you were part spider, then, yeah, I'd freak out. Part Lex Luthor? PFT! If he pulls that "I'm your dad" bullshit, you just go "You jerk off into a cup full of Superman's spunk--good job, Mr. Super-Villain-Genius!"

And I'll tag . . . Chip, Adam, Andy, Shuk, Troy, Erin, Doc, and Steve